Love Or Nothing

Written By: TQ
Translated By: Quatre Raberba Winner

*tap...taptap...ta...dadada...tap...*

In a room of absolute darkness, the errie bluelight of a laptop shimmers and gleams.

The blue light reflects off of Heero's face, making his expressionless feature even more errie than usual. He keeps on staring at the screen, with a quiet intensity that seems to suck in all the informations, and imprint them into his mind.

".....Remember, you must be ruthless when needed. Never let your enemies run free, you must eliminate any possible candidate, even if that means me--"

Erase all feelings and emotions. A repeated motto since he was a child, trained to have the extreme will to fight, and that skill to kill. Never to entangle emotions with it.

No emotions.

"Ninmu....ryoukai."

He slowly closes his blue eyes.

"....Haaa..."

That icy cool sundae, is another stream of burning fire, between the sparring and teasing of the lips and tongues.....

A kiss, too fast, too strong, too urgent, biting down on his lips, sending pain into his nerves; Duo's familiar breathing, his forceful repeating kisses, hungry, thirsting, draining him. Among the moans there release an interminable passion and torture--

Melted sundae rolls and slides down Heero's slender neck, slowly slides past his collarbone, as Duo's fingers lightly brush against the liquid, spreading it on the tender heated skin...

"....I've said before, I... don't like ... it..."

Heero turns on his back and closes his eyes. With a sweep, his urgent hands release the small rubber band that holds Duo's hair together with a heated passion, the wave-like brown hair comes tumbling down, covering and laying across his legs. Heero bends his knees slightly, the long hair sliding slowly downward.

"....don't like ... dessert?"

Duo's low voice seems a bit unclear, and even tremulous. The soft tongue slowly laps, and lick away the remaining sweet liquid, that burning hurting thirst.

"Then, let me help you ... to wash away that taste..."

Heero's brows furrow suddenly, and Duo kisses him between the legs with a smile. His hair, mixes with sweat, slowly falls over his skin and slides downward...

*Ka!!* The sound of a bullet in a gun ready to fire.

Duo looks up in alarm and freezes. The cold tip of a gun presses right against his forehead.

The trigger is readied to be pulled. Under those bangs, is an expression as cold as that of a machine.

It is rare that news coming from Dr. J would be this unclear. "Not confirmed"-- suggested the failure of the investigation, and at the same time made the whole mission even more difficult.

---What is confirmed, is that our information has been slowly filtered outside. Whoever that is responsible for this is one with a thorough knowledge of the Gundam system, and at the same time knows of our intentions. Maybe he has been bribed by the OZ, or maybe he has been a spy all along.

It's not fatal; no, at least not at this point. But, you must find out who it is, and eliminate him.

Don't worry about other matters for now. Heero, this is your new mission.

"...You're really going to kill me? ....Heero...."

Surprising, but his expression doesn't have a single trace of fear, it is this clear, not even a trace of guilt can be found.

If he's not really innocent, then he is doing too good a job acting---

"Do you want to hear your crime before I kill you?"

Heero gazes at him coldly, the hold on the gun never falters one bit.

How tragic. This whole scene before his eyes is so tragic that it is amusing in some way. That advice echoes in his mind again:

Always be on guard; even if it is someone who is close to you ...

Shut up! He has heard these kind of advice way too many times already. If Duo is really the traitor, he believes that he will be able to kill him, without mercy.

Even though they've been this close.

"Crime?"

There's a sudden but brief gleam in Duo's eyes. But on his face is a smile, a smile that suggests that he holds no interest in it, it is enough to make Heero angry.

"If it weren't for the fact that you look so serious, I would've suspected that you're trying to accuse me of rape."

Just as Heero's expression darkens, Duo gets up suddenly and lifts up Heero's hand where he is holding the gun, and at this moment, Heero pulls the trigger--

The bullet has lost its target. Heero's expression changes in realization, his two wrists have already been held captive by Duo. He pulls his wrists toward himself and as he throws Duo off balance, he lifts up his leg and sweeps at Duo's ankle. Just as he expected, Duo loses his balance completely and falls onto the bed, bringing Heero with him.

Duo never did give him a chance to escape, with a tumble, Heero is already trapped under him. The table has been turned, his hand which holds the gun has been pinned at the edge of the bed, the paralyzing force of the pressure from Duo prevents him from using his strength.

"What are you-- suspecting me of? ...No, you've already convicted my crime--is that right..."

Those dark stares. In Duo's eyes are the ashes and gloom of silent loneliness.

Given up all hopes and feelings. That low voice and the pressure he put on Heero's wrists, slowly expressing his moods. At the time he tightens his hold, his downcast face and long hair...at that moment.

He is doing too good a job acting.

Heero stares coldly into Duo's eyes.

But then why would he want to act anymore?

Duo has already turned the table on him, it's so easy to kill him now; the fatal point of a spy is having his true identity being found out or suspected-- that is so similar to him as well: is this funny or just plain tragic?

But Duo...is not killing him. Is it because he is confident that he can just keep on lying and pretend; or...is it that his intention is more than just stealing the information?

"Obliterating enemies, as well as anyone who may one day become an enemy--is my mission."

In darkness, Heero continues icily:

"Betraying the colonies, selling information to the OZ through the computer system, is that your new job?"

My enemy, is...... Is......anyone who betrays me! But why would that person be you .....

"What makes you think that it's me?"

A sudden pain between his fingers, the gun is already out of his hand to Duo's hand.

At that moment when Duo loosens his hold on Heero, and gets up, there seems to be a sadness in his eyes. He walks to the window and turns around, leaning against the edge of the table. His hand carrying the gun in a careless fashion.

"Sending out information using the network, and then tracing it back to the computer I've used, and from there finding some traces of info on me...using those info and claiming that I'm a spy, is that right?"

"Not much proof is needed."

"True." Duo nods, agreeing with Heero's words.

Heero slowly rises up from the bed. Duo silently approaches the bed again and pulls up the white bedsheet to cover his pale body.

"Getting suspected and accused of being a spy, I'm not surprised."

Duo gives Heero a smile, and reaches out to brushes back a strand of Heero's bangs.

This strange moment in time, this quiet and close moment. It is as if the tension, distrust, and struggle a moment ago are all just a game, an act. No, in comparison with that realistic feeling, maybe it is the scene in front of them right now that is more dreamlike.

Duo places his hand on the wall while running his other hand lightly over Heero's dark brown hair. Heero's cold stare as not changed a bit all this time, but when Duo's finger tip slides across his eyebrow lightly, Heero can feel his own eyelid flutters once.

Even now, when it is so easy to kill Duo now, he is still nervous. Duo smiles at him bitterly as he realizes Heero's distrust. Duo raises his eyebrows slightly and gives Heero that bitter smile again.

"I don't want to be killed by you Heero. I think you also know my personality. I'm not the type who will just let someone catch me. But, the minute that you've already seen me as your 'enemy' and at this very moment when you want to assasinate me--"

"I have to tell you, how angry I am."

Heero feels a sharp pain on his lower jaw as Duo tilts his face up roughly, and when he realizes what is happening, he has already been swallowed by Duo's intensity, his heat, his passion.

This force, as if it's insane, forcing...wresting...taking, the anger, the extreme anger exchanged in the kisses, is even hotter and and more intense than fire. Heero's wrists are pinned against the wall, the heat of the body, the heat of those gasps, there's no more holding back.

That forceful corrosive kiss prevents him from running away, prevents him from thinking, his will and mentality are sucked into this swirling torrent of heat and passion, no more resistence is allowed. He's melting, losing strength; his heart beat painfully from that pressure, he feels as if he is about to run out of air.

"What has been in my mind, what I'm been waiting for all this time, is because of that hatred--"

The grasps slowly soften, as if the anger is subsiding, but those tightening fingers leave small marks and bruises on the leg. Pain......

"You, will not understand my anger."

"No......" Heero grits his teeth, cold sweat running the side of his head, but it only makes Duo comes closer.

"No, maybe I betray anyone, maybe I betray the professor, betray the colony, but I will never betray myself!"

That fierce movement, Duo's hot mouth leaves those burning marks on his skin, marking him, carving him, over his neck, and those smooth collarbones, that moist skin. His wrists are still held captive, he can't even move them; Duo's arm reaches under his leg, bring it up, bending it.

"...Ah...!!"

His fingers curl into fists and then loosen again, as if losing strength...

Heero keeps on biting on his lower lip. Even as he shuts his eyes, he can still feel Duo's stare, penetrating him like fire, watching his suffered expression....

Being completely taken...filled, forced like this, hot, and yet so clear.....

"....Heero...."

He can feel warm breath between his eyebrows, then Duo's breath on the juncture of his neck and shoulder. His whisper low and hot....

"Heero...."

He kisses that closed eye, those furrowed eyebrows, feeling Heero's strong heartbeat, his blood coursing and boiling inside his veins, his breathing, in his hand, in his arms. Duo tenderly brushes a strand of his bangs away.

Despite resistence, he has still accepted this kind of relationship. Letting his body and senses unite with him, accepting this person, one who may betray him ... is that right....

...If he is really an enmey....if that is how the relationship is going to be....

"....You're gonna die this way, Heero...."

"Du...o?"

Heero opens his eyes dazely.

"AH....!!"

Another penetration, crushing, forcing, his wrists hurts under the pressure, he can feel Duo's long hair brushing against his chest, Heero feels everything before him suddenly turns white, he lifts up his head, and sees some of Duo's hair tangling with his, wet with sweat, the sweat beads gleaming in darkness...

The passion between the entangling of naked limbs, like hot lava rushing roaring, that close locking of bodies, trembling and moving, holding tightly onto each other...be it of enemies or of lovers, at this moment they can feel each other. As if afraid that it will end, but yet so urgent, rejecting commitment-- but walking toward death.....

"....Ah....Du...Duo...."

So sharp, sharp and hot and full of sorrow, the swift current of Death. The hot breathing of the God of Death, coldly tasting the ultimate ecstacy of robbing by force and of death--

That dark, tender God of Death slowly tilts up his face.

"....If you believe..."

He can hear Duo's deep tender voice burying in his heart as he drifts off into the deep territory of sleep.

"Then kill me ..... Heero."

"Even if I'm blessed with fortunes, nothing will ever wash away my hate-- what the OZ has done to me...I will make sure they get"

With a click, the hurting fingers manage to type on the keyboard unnaturally. The lights on the computer screen shifts and changes.

The old Federation files unfold like paper in front of his eyes.

The fingers on the keyboard slowly curl up into fist again--

They still hurt. Those bite marks and kiss marks left over from Duo--

".....You're still going to come after me right? Heero."

"I guess you'll have to come anyway, Heero. I'll make you remember. Make you remember my kiss, and the pain I've given you."

".....What has been in mind this whole time, is this hatred....."

.....Part of the Maxwell Church....rebellious forces...suppressed...

245 dead.

"I've never pitied myself. But this debt that they owe me, I will make sure the OZ pay for it--"

"And now my NEW CRIME is 'OZ spy'?"

Duo lowers his head and tilts his cap a bit downward before smiling lightly.

"Well, I guess what comes out of the mouth doesn't really count much. ....According to your information-- I'm your "enemy" is that right..."

Then, Heero, then follow your wish, and come after me---

Come get me. But I will never be killed by you. Before that happens, i will find the proof, and convince you of my innocence.

Yes Heero, come get me---

The stabbing pain. The hand slowly moves away from under his chin, he can feel his own warm breath on the wound.

That painful kiss.

In the dark, Heero gazes at his tightening fist.

This quiet....when he is missing someone else's heartbeat heside his.

"....Duo..."

-----------------------Love Or Nothing (END)---------------------
Notes:

This story has taken me seven hours to translate. My, time flies when you're translating yaoi... I don't think I did a good job on this one...Sorry about that. The author says that what prompted her to write this story is that she is thinking the other day that Duo's definitely more soft-hearted than Heero. So just how cruel or cold can Heero be? And at extreme circumstances, will Heero be able to kill Duo? She says that she really likes to write stories between Heero and Duo because there're more actions involved. Then she comments that if it is Trowa and Quatre, what would happen? That will be a wild card. And she says that she's going to attempt that as well.